Don Iago's Den of Arrogance

Pre-Launch

Mon, 10 Aug 2026 18:52:49 GMT

Shea confirmed that I'm all set to get keys in a week!

John said he can help me out with moving stuff over next Monday as well, which is helpful.

I've dropped off a literal shit-ton of stuff at Goodwill and Staples, and even got rid of two old monitors on Craigslist. So far no luck getting rid of an even older monitor, or getting rid of a pair of like-new boots that I'm asking $40 for. I'm not going to offer those for free.

Busy busy...

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Merrily We Roll Along...

Wed, 05 Aug 2026 20:07:25 GMT

You already know most if not all of what I'm going to talk about.

Despite Shea telling me that I could get Burlington Telecom at Keen's Crossing, it turns out that's only true if I'm okay with streaming service, which...not really, if I can help it. Though, I was also annoyed because I'd called BT and left messages a few times, and I know they're currently backlogged, but JFC, we were talking about me moving, and it could have been time-sensitive.

So, I'm moving to Xfinity, with reservations. On the plus side, signing up was stupidly easy through their web portal. It may also end up being cheaper for me. They also claimed I already have all the setup I need in the new apartment and I just need to activate it via the app...which I'm obviously not about to do anytime soon.

BT did say I can just drop off my equipment with them instead of needing to be around while someone disconnects me, so that's good.

Moving my electricity over was easy enough. Burlington Electric had a webform, and while I had to call Green Mountain Power, I think I was on the phone for under 15 minutes.

Yesterday Frang dropped off a number of large boxes. Awesome in terms of size, but a bit of a conundrum...I can't just load them up with boardgames or I won't be able to carry one. The same kind of goes for my larger CD box sets.

I feel like I'm running behind on packing, but I don't really know what I can do other than keep pushing. I still have another week-plus before my place becomes mine anyway.

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Second verse, same as the first!

Mon, 03 Aug 2026 18:44:31 GMT

Job, pack, exercise...job, pack, exercise...

Got my electricity all set to transfer over. Called Burlington Telecom but had to leave a message.
Ordered a new bed. Hopefully it will arrive at a good time.

The CD storage boxes I ordered are now backordered until late August, so it's a good thing I bought mine when I did. I'm starting to think I have far more than 500 CDs though, even not counting my collections.

Late last week I signed, sealed and delivered my lease. I need to stop by the post office to formalize my address change. It's pleasing to me that I'm actually going to live very close to it.

Ezen messaged me about Eufuria last week, and we've chatted a bit since then. I'm a little surprised, and curious to see whether this will portend more communication between us.

I really wish it would stop being so hot, and especially so humid, outside.

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Locking Down

Wed, 22 Jul 2026 18:59:35 GMT

Going with Booska for my move. They'll be arriving early on Wednesday the 26th. It amuses me that I'm using the same mover I used when I moved into my current place over 20 years ago.

Shea offered to get the ball started on the final paperwork early, either by having me come to her office or by emailing me the documents and having me sign off on them electronically. You get no points for guessing which one I chose. :p This also gives me a bit more freedom to review them before committing.

I had two people call me "kinda harsh" for saying: "Honestly, anyone trusting a machine to fix their grammar (and to a lesser degree spelling) deserves what they get these days." In a writing chat. Yeah, I don't regret saying that people shouldn't trust machines. It's been a little bit of an eye-opener to realize that even in writing chats it seems as though I'm a better writer than many.

Not much to say otherwise. Work, exercise, packing, rinse and repeat...

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And we're walking!

Mon, 20 Jul 2026 19:03:16 GMT

Called Hannaford Saturday morning hoping I could pick up boxes that afternoon, and was a little put-off when they told me I should come by the next morning...however, when I did so I got roughly ten boxes that are larger than most of the ones I've had, which is really exactly what I've been needing to do more substantive packing, so I can't exactly complain.

I did laundry Saturday night, and then I watched "Pillion", a movie featuring Eric from True Blood hooking up with Dudley Dursley from Harry Potter...or rather, the actors who portrayed those characters. If you'd told me a few years ago that I'd see that, I never would have believed you. Ultimately a rather sad little film (though perhaps with a happy ending) that came across to me as a cautionary tale about the dangers of failing to set expectations. There was a nice commentary track with the two actors and the director, and I like it. It makes me wish I was still a part of GLAM so I could suggest it for a movie night and discussion afterward. Alas, my GLAM days are long behind me.

Picked up the boxes Sunday, and then loaded old kitchen appliances into the trunk of my car and set off for Goodwill...only to discover that while they are open until 6, they close for donations at 4:30. Fucking inconvenient. So that will likely have to wait until this weekend.

However, since it was a beautiful day, I went for a hike for the first time in far too long!!! Nothing too stenuous, but I was seriously out of practice anyway, and I do feel accomplished.

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Moving Right Along

Wed, 15 Jul 2026 18:54:37 GMT

Requested quote from two movers. I believe there's a couple more I want to reach out to as well, but I need to re-check Shea's list. One of them already got back to me with a quote that was possibly over $1K. Ouch.

Got a haircut today. Very much hoping that will make this awful weather a bit more reasonable-feeling. Today's at least a bit cooler than it has been lately.

Exercising seems to be going well. I'm breaking two miles of walking fairly routinely. My legs hate me.

Packing is...maybe?...going well? I'm trying to do at least a bit each day, and yesterday I did some packing of my bedroom for the first time. I'm also starting to run out of DVDs that aren't in their proper cases.

Since I don't think anyone in here will care...I was in the FWG Officers' chat minding my own business when one of my fellow officers sent along an FYI that they felt an author had submitted an AI-generated work to them. I wasn't paying much attention to this at first, but after seeing I had 50 unread messages in the chat I decided to catch up.
...the work in question was a manuscript that I edited.
I didn't laugh or cry, but I was tempted to do both.
Hilariously, one of the things that the publisher found suspicious was that there were very few typos. ...yeah, because I edited them! SIGH.
I thought about reaching out to the author, but it would be weird since I'm in this co-mingled place of being his friend(-ish)/editor/FWG Officer and technically I shouldn't even know this happened. Indeed, it makes me wonder how things might have turned out if I wasn't the editor.

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I'm mad as hell...

Wed, 08 Jul 2026 19:01:47 GMT

...and I'm not going to take it anymore!!!

I'm not really mad, but man, things went a bit crazy and intense yesterday.

Besides my normal afternoon dietitian appointment, I had a periodontist appointment and then a massage (oh boo-hoo!), which was kind of a lot for me. I thought the periodontist was just going to be a quick check-up, but it turned out to be measuring my gums (god I hate that) followed by a cleaning. In a development that was both hilarious, in a way, and kind of unsettling, I saw the son of my usual periodontist, who is also a periodontist, and a hot guy who looked to be in his last 20s or 30s. As a 51 year-old, it felt pretty surreal to have someone inspecting me who was that much younger than I am. Clean bill of health, though they want me back in February.

The massage was pretty great.

To my significant surprise, Khaki messaged me yesterday morning, but due to...everything...I didn't get back to him until yesterday night. To my greater surprise, he was kind of apologetic for the harshness and/or lack of clarity/empathy with which he'd rejected my earlier overture, and clarified that he does hope he'll get his own life under control enough that he can seek me out, and that he does like me. We didn't talk for very long, but the words we exchange were nice enough, and it did help. Still, we'll see if/when I hear from him again.

I was less-than-thrilled to hear that Pepper got drunk at Anthrocon and proceeded to make a proper arse of himself...appparently so drunk he had no recollection of it, and apparently this may have been the kind of act that was so unambiguously awful that even he has freely admitted he was an arse and publicly apologized for it.
With reservations, I reached out to ask him if he was okay, and because he was wondering why he's such a jackass sometimes, I kind of seized the opening and finally, after years, pointed out the ways I felt he'd wronged me in the past. I wasn't trying to heap more shit on him, but if he was going to question his own behaviors...well, I had some examples.
The conversation actually went a little bit okay, though he also said he generally isn't very responsive online in general these days, claiming it's because he's work-focused.
I'm not going to delude myself into thinking much positive change will actually come from this, but at least I spoke my piece.

And damn, between Nocturne, Khaki and Pepper, July really seems to be the month for releasing my long-term burdens. I wonder who's next... But seriously, I'm so glad I've finally said aloud the things that have been weighing on me for so long. At least people can no longer claim they didn't know.

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Little Boxes...

Mon, 06 Jul 2026 19:01:11 GMT

After not having had any real contact since I put down my security deposit, and being aware that it hadn't posted yet, I reached out to Shea to find out what was up with that. I was a little worried that there might have been a problem, and while I couldn't imagine that they wouldn't have contacted me if there was...moving isn't something I want to fuck up.
So, it was a bit of a relief to hear from Shea this morning that everything's good and the plan is still for me to be able to move in starting August 17.

Yesterday I went out for a walk that I only intended to have be longer than two miles, but which turned out to be a bit over 4.6. Awesome, but I'm feeling it a little today. But with the stupid heat wave we'd had I hadn't even been using my walking pad, so really glad I got to do stuff with my legs.

Went to Hannaford and this time I was able to get two banana boxes off them. They have open tops, which isn't ideal, but could work for movies. I also stopped by the liquor store on my way into the office and got three smaller boxes, which may be well-suited to books and heavier items, and they anticipated me and invited me to stop by in the future to get more boxes! I think I'm going to need to buy special boxes for my boardgames, and I'm also thinking about buying some boxes tailored to CDs, but we'll see.

...wow, that was a pretty boring update.

Um...let's see...mom is probably going to come up around the weekend during my move transition period. That probably makes the most sense. Too early and if things go wrong I may not have the place yet, while too late and she might just get in the way of the movers and all. This also gives me a sense of when I should try to have a bed in the new place.

I will say the heatwave made me pretty excited to live in a place with central air. Even with the portable ductless AC I picked up, my living room and kitchen became miserable, and the most annoying part is that even after the temperature drops outside it takes time for the heat in my apartment to settle down.

Oh! I watched "Monty Python's Life of Brian" for the first time in decades, and "Network" for the first time ever. In a weird sort of synergy, they're kinda both about (non-)messianic figures who are ultimately crucified for their perceived sins. I can only assume that people who watched "Network" before the advent of bullshit like FOX News probably walked away from it thinking it was more fantastical than people watching it since FOX News and its ilk became a thing.

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Disappointing and Not Disappointing

Mon, 29 Jun 2026 19:06:06 GMT

Went to Amanda's on Saturday, which I probably wouldn't have done if Holly hadn't offered to drive, though alternately I might have offered to drive her. Point being, both of us ended up being glad we didn't go alone, which sets the tone for how this went.
The commute was nice enough. The weather was good, so riding the ferry was kind of a nice time, and I got a glorious picture of the lake reflecting the almost-full moon during the return trip.
Things didn't start until 5pm, which seemed strange except that Robert, the guy Amanda invited to join us as a possible match for Holly, had to work that day.
Honestly, I was having a pretty nice time just lazing on their porch and might have been content to keep doing that...but it was Not To Be.
We played two games, one involving magnetic words and one where the goal was less to answer questions honestly than to answer in the way you suspected other people were going to. I won a game of the second one. But I kind of wish we'd played something a bit more involving.
But afterward, Robert and Holly were talking, and I went over to join Amanda so that we might talk amongst ourselves...only to have the other two join us.
And then Robert started talking about hunting. Which is probably a bit of an odd choice when you're spending time with a furry, at least without having any idea how they might feel about the topic first.
He went on. And on. And on. Romeyn was busying himself with his phone, Amanda wasn't saying anything, I sure didn't have anything to say, and Holly was doing the verbal equivalent of smiling and nodding. To make matters worse, while Robert does make the most he can of his kills (he at least isn't hunting soley for 'sport'), he talked about having us over and cooking for us at some point...including testicles...and it was just, "Oh muffin, it's precious that you think that would ever, ever happen..."
I really wish Holly had been assertive enough to do a, "Well, it's getting pretty late..." And she really should have, because once she and I were in the car she made it clear that there was, to put it mildly, no spark between her and Robert. Not that I thought there was.
Well, at least I got out of the house. In retrospect, maybe I should be glad that the guy Amanda intended to try to set me up with couldn't attend. I was a little tempted to ask, rather crassly, "Is he a top or a bottom?" Heh.

Last night I watched "All of Us Strangers", which was unexpectedly devastating. It's written and directed by Andrew Haigh of "Looking", and features Andrew Scott from "Pride" and "Blue Moon" and Paul Mescal of "Hamnet". So, you can't go wrong. If you have any interest in seeing it, I recommend knowing as little as possible beforehand.

More surprisingly, someone in the FWG chat mentioned that they'd co-written a book with Khaki that was going to be published soon. The name of it rang a bell, so I did a little digging, and sure enough, I read it back in 2011 and, while I suspect I didn't do a full edit, I evidently did provide feedback.
This led to Alex and I talking a bit, and while it was a little hard to read his reactions, he seemed glad we were having a conversation.

Also, thanks to the wonders of Discord, late last week I ended up talking with Mercedes Lackey for the first time since I saw her in person at Anthrocon 2013. That was quite trippy.

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Trade-Offs

Thu, 25 Jun 2026 18:28:37 GMT

I've been managing over 2.5 miles in under an hour per day on my walking pad, which is pretty impressive for me...but it also means I'm losing the better part of an hour each day after work to walking and not doing much of anything else, and it's cutting a bit into my packing time. The current walking plan I'm on ends in a couple more days. I bought lunch at work today, so I might take a day off, especially since my legs are a bit pissy and I cut one of my toes while clipping a nail this morning, just adding insult to injury.

I'm probably going to Amanda's game thing. I'm not all that excited, but at least I'll get out of the house at least once before The Move becomes a real priority. I'll be carpooling with Holly, so at least I won't be driving solo. I don't know whether I would have seen Nocturne in any case, but I'm pretty fucking disappointed that he hasn't messaged me for almost three weeks now, and if he was going to Manchester Pride there's no chance I'd be able to join him with so little notice at this point.

Joaquin and I have had some back-and-forth regarding B5, but nothing especially noteworthy.

Otherwise, things feel very quiet right now except for the oncoming storm.

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People Being People

Wed, 17 Jun 2026 18:53:03 GMT

Amanda's been talking about hosting a gaming night, but she lives on the other side of the (substantial) lake, so it's not an easy matter to visit. Her -actual- reason for this is because for some reason she seems to think if she gets Holly and a guy she knows in the same room then there may be sparks. Okay.
So she messaged me today to ask me about it...but she only brought up one specific weekend, and it's the weekend of Manchester Pride, and if Nocturne expresses interest in repeating last year...that's not even a contest for me, especially since it's not as though Amanda is trying to set -me- up with a guy (that I know of)...and frankly, I'm not sure Amanda really appreciates where my interests lie.
Anyway, I told her I couldn't commit to that weekend, and she kind of asked for permission to go ahead with her planning, which was nice of her...but it would have been nicer if she'd come up with more than one possible weekend to do this.

I haven't heard anything from Nocturne just about a week ago, so while I would like to know whether he's doing Manchester Pride (and wants me to come with), it's not an unreasonably long time since I last heard from him. I was a little surprised to find out that Dirigo may not be going since I kind of met him there last year, but he may go to a BBQ instead, which makes me wonder whether Nocturne would be doing the same, or...well, we'll see what we see, I guess.

To my significant (one might even say vast) shock, Scrap Yard Leather accepted my commission! They turned me down 2-3 times before, and especially with my upcoming move I considered not applying at all. I'd even mentioned in their chat that I vaguely wondered whether my commission just wasn't exciting enough for them to want to take it on....though they said it was just a matter of limited slots, I wasn't sure I believed them.
As it is, they only took on 15/130 applications, so I think I'm allowed to be surprised that they accepted mine!

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Slower But Not Slow

Mon, 15 Jun 2026 18:44:47 GMT

It was such a fucking relief to get home to no notes or calls or texts from my landlady on Friday after work. I took things easy for the first time since I'd gotten her text.

Last night I finished editing Book 5 for Joaquin, which is awesome since that's a huge thing off my plate in the time leading up to my move.

Still no news on the secret project at work, which is weird, maybe? Beats me!

I'm really tired today, so having nothing to do tonight is going to feel nice. I can't even really get a lot of work done on my porch because recyclables don't get picked up until tomorrow.

Heard from Donukitsu for the first time in awhile. It was nice to know he hasn't forgotten about me. :)

I think that's all I've got. Hm.

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Can I take a break?

Fri, 12 Jun 2026 18:57:03 GMT

On Monday night my landlady texted me to say she wanted to come over Friday (this) morning to check out the condition of my apartment. That was enough to spike my BP.
I called her Tuesday, which I needed to do anyway to make it official I was planning to move. I asked about the possibility of keeping the place through Labor Day weekend, which she rejected on the grounds that college kids were going to want the place at the top of September. That made me do a bit of a double-take, as I just don't see how she can flip my place around that quickly. Then I asked about the Friday visit and she assured me it's just to see what might need to be repaired and that she didn't care about clutter. I kind of tried to note that, since I am moving anyway, the later she waits to do that, the better shape the place will be in, but I didn't get any traction there either. She's a nice person, but...sigh.
In any event, I haven't gotten any phonecalls or texts today, so I'm guessing/hoping that means the visit went without incident (I'll be kind of annoyed if she postponed it), though for all I know I'll get home to a snippy letter or something. I'm not sure what she was expecting when she didn't even give me a full week to work on my place.

Because I haven't been nervous-excited enough lately, yesterday my boss's boss threw a "Quick Chat" with him and my boss on my calendar. That made me twitchy enough to upset my stomach, as I was kind of hoping it was about my much-anticipated promotion, but for all I knew I was about to get terminated.
He prefaced the call by saying he knows they've been dragging their feet on the promotion...but this call wasn't about that. A little disappointing, but at least he owned it.
Instead, he was calling about a special project that may involve up to a week's worth of travel (and maybe more) and detached assignment doing stuff for my boss's boss's boss! I actually got told that if there's a request for me to travel to just go ahead and book it, and if necessary to make up a list of the stuff I do so that it can be off-boarded while I'm busy with whatever this is!
I made a point of mentioning my upcoming move, because I ain't travelling anywhere in August, for instance.
I've heard nothing since that call, but still, exciting!

I'm in the office right now, because I sure as hell didn't want to be at home while Donna was looking around, but otherwise, I think I could sleep for a fucking week at this point.

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Commitments

Mon, 08 Jun 2026 18:52:25 GMT

Saturday morning I went over to Keen's Crossing (Keens Crossing?) and dropped off my security deposit without much ado. It felt pretty good to save $1500 on it, I must say.
Talking with my parents afterward felt a little less good. Dad was quick to bring up that now I'll need to find movers (JFC dad how about giving me a little room to breathe first?), and also suggested that all I really needed to do when I move out was "unclutter" the place, which, first of all, I'm doing by moving, and secondly, I kind of think that's not true.
Mom was (as usual) a bit more reasonable, though when I somewhat glibly noted that I don't even know where I'll put my winter tires, she suggested I keep them in the trunk of my car, and that's...just, No.

More vaguely disappointing and hurtful were the underwhelming reactions of my friends. I may have brought it up too subtly, but Amanda just replied, "Cool." while John made a single joke about it and then radio silence. I mentioned this to Brom, who I don't really think of as a friend these days, and he suggested that maybe my friends were used to moving enough that they didn't really consider it a big deal. I don't really think that's true...but if it was, how shitty, because they should know it's a big deal for me even if it isn't a big deal to them.

This morning Amanda said she hadn't gotten a lot of sleep over the weekend, which helped a bit, and we had a proper conversation.

Finally heard from Nocturne again, for the first time in awhile. He was a little apologetic about that, which was nice. He kind of implied that if my older niece's Bat Mitvah didn't conflict with his daughter's birthday that he would attend with me...I'm not getting overly excited about that, but it was surprising that I didn't get a No or something more ambiguous. I don't really expect anything to come of it, but it would be nice if it did.
With significant reservations, and as noncommitally as possible, I brought up Manchester Pride in the context of whether he was going. I'm not sure I should have done that, really, but we'll see what he comes back with I guess.

I actually did start on the long process of disassembling my apartment last night...finally unpacked the portable A/C that I'd backed on Kickstarter and which had helpfully arrived last October, and if the small test run I gave it last night is any indication, then holy shit...even the fan felt awesome.

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Getting There

Wed, 03 Jun 2026 19:03:28 GMT

Bad News and Good News

The Bad News is that I didn't put down a deposit on the Willow unit, meaning it's still a bit up in the air and the uncertainty is a bit maddening.

The Good News is that the reason why I didn't put down a deposit is that I met with Shea yesterday and she told me that Keen's Crossing is going to have a (somewhat secret, it seems) open house on Saturday morning, and that on that day the security deposit will be $500 rather than the roughly $2K it would ordinarily be. Which is kind of amazing. I'd also get my first month's parking free, but that's almost an afterthought by comparison. So, that's pretty huge...but it does mean I feel as though I need to get there early on Saturday, because I'll be beating myself up if I miss out.

Between this and Leo's passing, I do feel like I now have two strong indicators that it's time to move. Indeed, everyone who's heard about Leo's death has agreed that I should take that as a sign that it's time to pull up stakes.

If disassembling a big box that held my Corsair monitor counts as starting to pack, then I've started to pack!

Editing is going very well now that my PC is no longer being a whore. I'm so happy about that. I should be finished with this book by the end of June, clearing July to focus on packing.

No contact from Nocturne. I can understand that he might be busy, but if he was going to go incommunicado, he might have bothered himself to tell me that, especially given his recent ghosting of me? Sigh... Donukitsu has also been quiet, but at least I know he's moving to Japan, which is a pretty damn good excuse.

I'm a bit annoyed with Amanda and a bit baffled. It feels as though her empathy skills have been degrading, and I don't know why that would be or whether it's something I should confront her about.

That's about it...not that I'd really be able to handle much else.

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So Much for Normalcy

Mon, 01 Jun 2026 19:00:17 GMT

I'd just started to feel like life was back to normal...I didn't have any crazy plans for awhile, my PC was mostly behaving itself, I had some rhetorical moving options but noting presently on the slate, there wasn't any crazy friendship drama...

...and then, last Wednesday, Shea, the property manager over at Keen's Crossing, emailed me to say that a Willow unit was going to be available starting August 15, and that I should let her know by June 1 or she was going to have to post it online, at which point anyone who put down a deposit could claim it.

I ended up having about five phonecalls with my parents within 48 hours.

I'm still not sure this is a great move for me...Willow isn't quite as large as I'd hope for, and moving is just going to be a massive undertaking even with help...but something did happen to make me more persuaded that it was a good idea...

I texted Leo and Donna (landlords) to let them know that they might be hearing from Keen's Crossing, and to thank them for being great landlords for over 20(!) years.

To my dismay, my phone rang about five minutes later.

It appeared to be Leo, and I actually greeted him by name, only to find out it was Donna calling...and that Leo had passed away in April. :| Besides telling me that, she was asking about whether there was any significant damage to the apartment (none that I know of?), and to get a better sense of my timetable, because she was really hoping I wasn't planning to move out in winter when maintenance would be more challenging. I was able to assure her that I wasn't planning to move mid-winter.

Tomorrow I'll likely be putting a holding deposit down on Willow. I am deeply nervous, and it's crazy to think it hasn't even been a full week since the floor dropped out from under me.

Less nerve-wracking: I dropped my car off for an inspection and tire changeover on Wednesday afternoon (something about that day...). I wasn't -that- surprised that they called me to say their mechanic was running behind, and it's not like I -need- my car during the week.

I was more surprised when I hadn't heard from them by noon on Thursday, and when I called them they said the printer they use for inspection stickers was out of order but that they'd have it fixed Friday morning...which they did, and I got my car back without issues other than the delay. Still...

But yes, my computer is (mostly) behaving normally, and editing is back on track. I should be done with this book later this month, which will be a good thing if this move proceeds. Everything else is fine I guess. I kind of wish I was moving elsewhere, but nobody's exactly knocking down my door begging me to live near them. Sigh.

Oh, I thought I was going to have a boring Memorial Day weekend, but then Leona and I were chatting and she suggested we make an Escape Room happen, and I also suggested we could do a movie in the event that the Escape Room didn't happen, so we did both.
She was running late to see "Project Hail Mary" (if you liked "The Martian" you'll probably like this, though the two are significantly different), so I ended up finding a seat, and it's a good thing I did. The theater was packed, which was a bit mind-blowing considering the movie was definitely not a new release by then. I enjoyed it except for the sheer number of people and the fact that the theater was a bit warm (perhaps beause of said people). Leona didn't arrive before they dimmed the lights, and afterward I found out that when she arrived the movie was sold out! Happily, she invited me to grab dinner with her partner, so we went to an Irish Pub place and I had a burger and drink that put me in a food and alcohol coma. It was bad, but at least I had nothing else going on.

The Escape Room was a decent time. We finished with four minutes to spare, which was almost anticlimactic. Besides Leona and her partner, it was the usual suspects of Rustyc, Phaaze and Atlas. A collective meh from me, but they were alright at least. They arrived late enough that I was a bit worried we wouldn't get in or that they'd take time away from us (I wouldn't have blamed them). Afterward we got frozen yogurt, which was a decent time (I can't remember when I last did that).

Today's another day where I found a routine task that Aaron somehow fucked up, though at least it wasn't a severe fuck-up. Just a bewildering one.

Linktree has decided to embrace AI, which is annoying in that I spent a lot of time yesterday finding a new service. So now I'm at https://siphedious.carrd.co/, which is probably not exciting to anyone.

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A New Age...

Wed, 06 May 2026 17:55:25 GMT

As of this week I'm back to four days in-office per week, though not full days at least. Thanks, I hate it.

Today I went in late because I had a doctor's appointment for labwork in the morning, and my drive ended up taking an extra 15-20 minutes before the primary road I use to get into the office was closed due to construction. I didn't know this until I was detoured, and my attempt to course-correct simply guided me to a part of the road that was also closed. As it turned out, even Google Maps wasn't updated for the road closure, and I ended up passing my own apartment as I pursued an alternate option. Just so...damn...stupid.

We did get lunch from Chipotle today. I guess enjoy the free lunches while they're a thing.

Nocturne went quiet for a bit longer than usual, but I did hear from him today, and it wasn't even a week or anything, and I know I need to give him space, even if I don't really understand it. DonuKitsu and I have been exchanging pics, and I have to admit, it's rather flattering that he seems so into me. Fabre sent me some nice pics as well, but he's so flaky online and such a poor communicator that it's hard to take him very seriously.

Editing has been going well.

Hm. I guess things are kind of boring right now...

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Normalcy

Thu, 30 Apr 2026 19:01:09 GMT

Birthday Shenanigans went alright. The weather was gorgeous, which was a pleasant change from last year, when it was rainy the whole time. The food was as spectacular as ever. I ended up in the same room I had last year, which I find hilarious. I hiked up to the chapel for the first time, and I got to see cows!!! I used the swimming pool and the hot tub, and it is pretty cool being in an outdoor hot tub with a mountain view.
The biggest downside was that all of my friends just daytripped on Saturday, so all of the stuff I just mentioned I basically did by myself, and the evenings got a little lonely, and I don't really know that I could justify doing this again if nobody stays over, because yeah that stuff was fun, but do I just want to repeat it again? I know people had other plans, but it kind of feels as though these days nobody has time and/or a sense of adventure, and I'm tired of it.

Nocturne's earning the Consistency Award, though he's not quite earning the Effort Award. I appreciate that I am hearing from him at least once every three days, but it's a little frustrating that it is only once every three days. Still, it is a lot better than it was, but...I don't know what this is. I mentioned to him that Lyla's Bat Mitvah is -next- May, so we'll see if he shows any appetite for that...for all I know we'll hate each other by then...or worse, he'll be ghosting me again.

My computer (mostly) seems to be behaving itself. I'm still a bit leery, but Word hasn't disappeared while I've been editing, and I haven't really experienced any crashes at particularly bad times.

A couple of days ago I got to chat with Donukitsu, a guy who Nocturne, I think, brought to one of the FCL parties. He actually did cuddle with me a little bit at the party, unless Nocturne himself (do I sound bitter? I'm a little bitter), and I would have liked to have gotten to know him better. He's about half my age, but we seem a bit simpatico...so naturally he's going to Japan for a year shortly, and I haven't seen him online since that initial conversation, though he did apologize for not being around more.

Met a couple of folks on f-list who are proving somewhat diverting, though it's too soon to tell whether it's going to be anything especially memorable ultimately.

John called Debian out after Debian claimed to have bought a boat and John found it available for sale online. Debian proceeded to change his username to "Sadness". I couldn't even find him in my contacts until I realized he'd deleted my chat history with him, which was...irritating. John felt bad for possibly having damaged Debian's mood. I was less sympathetic toward him, mostly because he's been lying so much and so pointlessly that he probably had a reality check coming. Indeed, I wondered whether he had some sort of schizoaffective disorder.

I think I've been fighting a cold for the last couple of days. Yesterday in particular I decided not to go into the office because I was feeling a bit cruddy. I'm here today, but I'm kind of glad almost nobody else is.

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There and Back Again

Wed, 22 Apr 2026 18:45:04 GMT

When we last left things with Nocturne, it was September and he was no longer replying to my text messages and no message I sent to him on Telegram was being double-checked. This was frustrating perhaps to the point of inflicting trauma, because I was fond of him and had no idea what was going on with him, but also because I had no idea whether I'd done something wrong. There were no indications I had, but the fact was that he'd stopped communicating with me, and that our frequency of communication had been struggling since I'd visited him, which was obviously alarming.

So, as you can readily imagine, I had no idea whether he'd be at FCL, though it seemed likely since he -lives there-, and I had no idea whether he'd want to have anything to do with me. Hell, I worried this might bleed-over into mutual associates.

It's consequently morbidly hilarious that when someone who was walking past me stopped to say hi, I absolutely failed to recognize it was him at first. Or rather, I knew it was someone familiar, but I couldn't place who it was until I saw his badge...at which point I imagine all the blood drained from my face.

He seemed happy to see me though, and continued to seem happy to see me during the con, though not necessarily, like, hugely so. He did send me an explanation on Telegram, though I'm not really sure I understood it...we unfortunately never had one-on-one time during the con, so I was never able to really talk it through with him.

The con wasn't without difficulties relating to him...at one point he had two guys cuddling with him during my party on my bed, and seemed pretty blissfully unaware that I was there. He didn't do a great job of communicating after his initial explanation, and, the worst, he said he'd come to the Shiny Pool Party I was hosting but then no-showed (arguably for good reason), which also meant that Sunday night I had the distinct sense I wouldn't even get to say goodbye to him.

On the better side, he invited me to lunch with a few friends (who it turned out I knew) before I hit the road...I hadn't really been expecting to hear from him at all, which would have sucked a lot, and while grabbing lunch alone with him would have been preferable, this was at least something.

He hasn't kept in touch with me quite every day during the con, and when he does message me it doesn't tend to be more than a message at a time, but he's managed most every day since the con. He also said before I left (though I wouldn't quite say he promised) that he wouldn't ghost me like he did ever again. He's shown some openness to seeing each other outside of a con, and perhaps even being the one to do the roadtrip instead of me visiting him, though we don't have any inklings of an actual plan right now.

So...definitely not everything I'd hope for, or even everything I necessarily deserve, but something at least. I'm still worried he'll disappear again, and I still have questions I need to ask him, but...it's something. We'll see.

I'm looking forward to going back to the Trapp Family Lodge for Birthday Shenanigans this weekend, though I wish I was anticipating cuddles with...well, anyone. Not for lack of trying, just nobody's really available. I don't even have anyone spending the night this time AFAIK. I think I might miss Ray and his boyfriend a bit, but I've barely heard from him in months, and the last time we really talked he said he'd talk with me about things with Vice, and then entirely dropped the ball on that, so I'm a little miffed with him.

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FCL and What Followed

Tue, 21 Apr 2026 19:25:05 GMT

As much as I was being hyperbolic when I dubbed FCL, "the con of three ex-boyfriends" it turned out to be not especially inaccurate. For better and/or worse.

Pepper: Rooming with Pepper went fine, perhaps better than I expected. He was a Perfect Gentleman(tm), which wasn't surprising, and a long time ago might have been disappointing, but in this time it just...was. If he had any interest in doing anything with me, he never let on, and I would have been surprised if he had. For my part, I wasn't planning to go out of my way to make myself vulnerable to him.
He unexpectedly invited me to grab dinner with him Sunday night, which was nice, though it may have been because he didn't know anyone else still at the con at that point. Still, he didn't have to do that. We went to a burger place that Phaaze had spoken highly of, and that really hit the spot. Pepper actually had to leave the hotel at 4am the next morning to catch his flight (he'd moved it up from later in the day), though amusingly he 'snuck' back into the room because he'd forgotten his headphones. All in all, it was nice to see him, though things definitely didn't feel the way they used to, and maybe that's for the best. While walking to the burger place I kind of went into my frustrations with him, but only at about 50% of what I could have done. It would be nice to think he'd be more receptive now, but I don't know.

Ezen: Eh-zen indeed. Despite 'plans' to grab food on Friday afternoon, we didn't ultimately grab food until Sunday. It was nice enough, but the fact that he'd postponed by 48 hours during a con stuck with me. He was also leaving that day, perhaps not long after we got food, so there were no shenanigans...not that I necessarily wanted any by that point. After telling me he'd let me know if he couldn't attend my panel, he entirely no-showed on it, though he did apologize as soon as he saw me again. I guess part of the confusion was that for him lunch is at noon, while I usually eat around 1:30 or later...especially at a con...this is the kind of thing that we could have sorted out earlier on, but still, he didn't suggest grabbing dinner instead or such either. He did hangout in my room a bit Thursday night at least, and this time he didn't throw out any stupid lines about how he'd already gotten laid. I'm assuming he -did- get laid during the con, and since it wasn't with me...well, I was leery of just being a notch on his bedpost. In the end, it was nicer to see him than to avoid him or not see him...I think...but I'm not feeling much of anything here, and we've barely talked since the con.

Nocturne: Uh, ask again later.

Exeter: Pretty cool guy, and handled his first furry con well. Just a little annoying at times, but only a little. He does kind of make a point of saying how much he's not allowed to fool around. Not my type, which is probably for the best since he's...not allowed to fool around. I'd happily room with him again sometime.

Mykul: SIGH. Okay, last year he was coming on a bit strong, but he was also in the middle of a divorce, and I get rebound. This year though, he was a bit too open about how he was "open for business". Friday night he didn't sleep in our room, which led me to consider that for the rest of the con I'd be hearing about how successful he was. Thankfully it didn't come to that; actually, he's been pretty quiet since he left the con, though as far as I know he had a good time. I may deprioritize him as a possible roommate in the future though. He also had an unfortunate knack of trying to talk to me while I was trying to focus on other things, and sounding like he was just trying to fill silence that I was quite comfortable with.

My panel: More people than I expected, which was nice! But fewer presenters than i would have liked, and most of them only had excerpts that were at most a page long, which made offering feedback challenging. The best work of the evening was probably a poem(!) about being a bartender, written by someone who wasn't even old enough to tend bar, making it all the more impressive. Surprisingly, the panel did run its full length, aided in no small part by my hitherto unknown ability to vamp about writing and editing for an obnoxiously long time.

I'll go into other things tomorrow, perhaps.

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"Calm" before the storm

Tue, 07 Apr 2026 19:18:25 GMT

Last week my Windows desktop went from crashing intermittently to crashing within five minutes of booting, quickly enough that I didn't even have time to try to troubleshoot before it would restart again. At least I'd managed to make Windows my default OS so I didn't have to deal with my PC trying to boot into Linux instead, but after two days of that (during which I couldn't give it a lot of attention because of work), I finally gave up and restored my Windows partition from backup. While the PC is still crashing intermittently, it's at least loading successfully now.

FCL starts on Thursday, and I feel like it's going to be "the con of three ex-boyfriends" for me.
Ezen's been okay about staying in touch, but not great. He said one thing that made it sound like he's planning to sow his wild oats at the con, which was hauntingly reminiscent of ANE, though perhaps I misinterpreted him. I guess we'll see what I get. His comment did prompt me to check his bio and promptly recall that he's 20 years younger than I am, so...that kinda tracks.

Pepper had been very quiet, but just piped up in the roommate chat, so he's still alive and planning to go apparently. I'm trying to keep some distance.

Nocturne's as much of a ghost as he's been since September. I don't even know whether he's paying attention to the group chat we're in together. I wish he'd say...anything.

Other than The Three Evil Exes, there's a guy named Dycey who's shown some interest in meeting and possibly having shenanigans. He seems like he might be worth getting to know better, but I'm...cautious.

It's snowing here, which is just awful, but hopefully it's the worst weather we'll get for the next week or so, and it's not really sticking or anything.

Though I'd intended to spread my errands over the weekend and get a haircut today, I ended up doing everything on Saturday. This does mean that Sunday I only needed to call family back. Talking with Judy was alright, though she does like to tell her stories. Talking with Michael and Adele was briefer than I expected and more tolerable than I thought it might be.

Oh, and I'm 51 now.

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The Calm Between Storms

Tue, 31 Mar 2026 18:44:34 GMT

On Friday I turn 51. Eh. FCL and my weekend getaway to the Trapp Family Lodge are my parties. But it would be nice if -something- happened that day. Though the weekend (Saturday at least) is going to be a little busy with pre-FCL errands.

I have started packing for the con though, and I copied my schedule onto my phone, which pleases me. I kind of figure if I can get small tasks done every day between now and when I leave on Thursday that that might make a real dent, though Thursday morning's still likely to be a PiTA.

I've kind of thought about trying to find a local to carpool with (I could probably ask Thrall, though I think he's still living with Dream), but I find I just don't care all that much. I don't even know which other VT Furs are going (though I could guess), and I suspect I'm not really in the group-chat that's being used for the con, though it's not as though anyone's made noise about how I should join it either.

With significant reservations, I reached out to Ezen for basically the first time since ANE 2024, when he kind of ghosted me. I think part of what motivated me was that since he is going to FCL I wanted to have a sense of whether I should expect to avoid him during the con, and I even said in my initial message to him that if he wasn't interested in potentially reassociating that he could simply not respond to my message.
Somewhat to my surprise he did respond, and we've had a bit of nice conversation, including him expressing regrets for how things went at that ANE. I certainly still have my doubts, but we'll see...and if nothing happens with him, I have three roommates and other people I can focus on.

The battery in my Galaxy Ring seems to be dying, but the real question is whether I should even care since I wear my watch basically all the time anyway. I first got my Oura Ring years ago before I really had a smartwatch, but for the last few years I've kind of wondered whether I was just being redundant.

I'm happy to be able to say that even with my Florida trip I'm well ahead of schedule on my editing of Book 5 for Joaquin. I'm not even exactly sure why the editing has been moving along so well, but it's very nice to not be feeling any pressure to have it completed on time.

No updates on potentially moving. Waiting to hear back from Shea, though I'll reach out to her if I haven't heard anything by later this week. In a way though, I really don't want anything to be available currently, because I'd really like to see how my promotion and (probable?) raise impact what I can comfortably afford.

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There and Back Again

Thu, 26 Mar 2026 18:40:16 GMT

Was on vacation visiting my folks in Florida for basically the last two weeks. It was nice to see them, mostly, though a week and a half is kind of a lot and there were a handful of arguments. The weather was gross after the first few days, often being too windy/rainy/cloudy/cold...it may have been the worst streak of bad weather I've had while down there, and I'm glad I got beach time in early, because after that the weather didn't permit for more of it. The place where my parents were staying at least included an outdoor pool, but I'd much rather spend time at the beach than at a pool, and not just because the pool tended to have a fair number of people present (though not typically many in it, at least).

On one of the nicer days mom and I kayaked out to Peanut Island, walked to the beach and did some goggling (many fish, though not many varieties), and then walked around the island before kayaking back to the mainland. That was fun, though objectively we really didn't do as much kayaking as we've done in the past. Still, it was pretty breezy during the return trip, enough to make it a bit challenging.

Another day we went to the Norton Museum for the afternoon. Some nice art, including a Monet, but I've been there a few times before and I'm not sure anything was much changed from prior visits. Still, it beat doing nothing!

We went to a nature reserve that initially didn't seem to have much to offer beyond some interesting landscapes, but we later saw a few Aninghas and then (gasp!) an alligator, one that came within five feet of us. That was very exciting!

Early in my visit mom and I went for a walk over the Singer Island bridge, and on the way back we walked along a pier and saw several starfish and even a couple of rays. That was pretty cool.

First Class Delta was fairly disappointing. Snacks, but no meals. Free liquor, though, though since my flights down were in the early morning I wasn't about to do that.

Movies I saw:
Z2: As much fun as the first time around, if more predictable.
The Devil Wore Prada: I'm not quite sure I understood why this is a big deal, but it was -interesting-, and Merryl Streep gave an amazing performance.
"Spinal Tap II: The End Continues" - I probably weirded out my fellow passengers by audibly holding back laughter a few times, though it's not as good as the original.

More to come, perhaps!

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Prelaunch

Thu, 05 Mar 2026 19:44:10 GMT

Hopefully by this time next week I'll be enjoying Florida weather and the company of my parents for a bit over a week. I'm pretty damn excited to get out of Burlington and away from work and the housing shit I've been dealing with for the last few weeks now.

Got a haircut yesterday, I've got cash for the trip, and I know where my passport is. Gotta do laundry on Saturday and then pack. I really want to have as much done as possible before Monday, because my flight Tuesday is stupid-early.

Furcationland is pissing me off. Besides the dangling plot thread of Nocturne and knowing I'll see Pepper again, the Programming folks told me they scheduled my panel for 11:30pm - 1:30am on Saturday night. For some types of panels (mostly AD ones) I can see how that might have some merit, but for a writing panel? It feels like a bit of a WTF. When I asked them about the possibility of an earlier slot, their initial response was that they might be able to fit me in earlier in the day, but that after the first hour I'd be in conflict with the Fursuit Parade, which also means I certainly wouldn't be able to participate in the parade. The late-night timeslot would obviously preclude me doing anything else later Saturday night too, though that almost feels like a minor consideration. So I'm considering withdrawing my panel altogether, and it's annoying because there's not exactly an abundance of writing panels at northeast cons usually, and I like helping writers and the writing community, but JFC...

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Another Stupid Day

Wed, 25 Feb 2026 19:51:38 GMT

We did a breakfast social thing at work, and when the return to office BS came up, Dawn, who I've always thought was a bit of an idiot, opined that, "Hey, at least we all have jobs and blah blah blah..." and I wanted to deck her. It was also suggested to me that if you're hybrid now, then even if you moved outside a reasonably commutable distance that you'd still be expected to go into the office, which is just nuts.

I applied to Keens Crossing and they said they'll review my application and get back to me about setting up a tour. This is going faster than I expected, and making me feel a bit hopeful. Several of their units look pretty great on paper at least.

Heard back from Jan and I have a guilty feeling that I'll probably need to tell her, essentially, "thanks but no thanks".

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